“Family” can mean different things to different people.
Our definitions on what a family is (and what it means to be part of one) are often influenced by personal experiences, different cultures, economics and society as a whole.
There are also many different types of families: immediate family, extended families, complex and step-families, traditional, adopted and foster families. You may even think of your friends as your family, or your co-workers, or even your pets.
However you define “family,” it’s safe to say the people you include in the group are important to you in one way or another.
The question is: where does that leave the definition of “family”?
What Family Means According to the Dictionary
Just as people have different ideas of what family means, so do dictionaries. In fact, The Free Dictionary has no less than 10 definitions!
For example, one entry tells us a family is “a fundamental societal group in society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children.” While this is a great starting point, it does leave out several modern family structures.
There are also childless families and complex families, where one or both of the biological parents have remarried.
Another entry in The Free Dictionary’s list of definitions reads: “Two or more people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one another and reside usually in the same building.”
This second definition is saved by the use of the word “usually.” After all, complex families very rarely (if ever) live in the same building. And extended families are just as unlikely to share a house!
With this in mind, we will be using the second definition of family for reference throughout this post.
Who (and What) Makes a Family?
Traditionally, the nuclear family was made up of a mother, father and one or more children. Even today, this remains the standard depiction of a family in the media.
However, modern family structures are sometimes very different. Single-parent families are more common, as are families where the children are raised by their grandparents or by homosexual couples. Other families don’t include children at all, either by choice or by circumstance.
So while the picture of two parents and their children remains the basic idea of family, a much broader definition is needed to fairly and accurately define the term.
This is where the second definition from earlier comes in – and even that remains lackluster because it doesn’t include animals.
Pets as Family
95% of pet owners in the US consider their pets to be part of their family.
Pets require a measure of responsibility and should always be considered a long-term commitment, which certainly fits them into the definition of “family”.
Couples who cannot have children (or simply don’t want to have them) often look upon their pets as the alternative. The same love and care that would ordinarily be lavished upon a child is given to the animal instead, whether it be a cat, dog or even a horse!
Plus, for further emphasis, it’s not uncommon for someone to mourn the passing of a beloved pet in the same way they would a human family member.
Friends as Family
While considering friends as family fits perfectly into the preferred dictionary definition, it remains an overlooked understanding of what a family unit is. This is disappointing, as many people consider friends to be as close, if not closer, than their immediate and extended families.
Whether there have been bad relations in the past leading to families splitting, or family members passing, it’s often our friends who form a sort of “surrogate” family unit. Because of this, close-knit friend groups very often share the same values and responsibilities found in the traditional family unit.
Even those who do have highly supportive and loving families are prone to think of their closest friends as a second family.
Redefining What Family Means
Clearly, our dictionaries have a long way to go before accurately defining the word “family”.
Fortunately, that doesn’t mean we have to wait for them. Every person already has their own unique understanding of what a family is. As mentioned earlier, this is usually based on personal experiences and the cultural or societal norms they’re exposed to growing up and as adults.
This means it is already an intuitive ability for every person to ascribe personal meaning to the word “family” in a way that partially supports and enhances the dictionary’s definition. Regardless of how you choose to define family, your unique definition is the one that means the most.
If you ever need any help ensuring the safety, security, and success of your family, the PWCP is here for you.